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So much more than a clean home

Dearest Flylady & Alex,

I've been trying to FLY for a long time. As I've been decluttering, I've been reminded of all the years that have passed where I wasn't loving myself. It's been so cleansing just throwing these unneeded reminders of my past away. And reminding me to be thankful for what I have now.

I have a new life now. I have a husband who loves me, 2 DSD's 14 & 12 and DS who just had his 2nd birthday. But none of this came easily. I met my husband after his first wife passed away, tragically and suddenly. To make it more challenging, his youngest daughter was just set to undergo another round of chemotherapy. She has a brain tumor that's wrapped around one of her eyes and she's partially blind because of it and has other challenges as well, but she's thriving.

Needless to say, when I came in the picture, CHAOS was everywhere, in all of our lives. Fast forward to now, and we are FLYing- and it started with changing my thinking. For me, this finally happened through the encouragement I received from FlyLady Premium. FlyLady Ashley (my mentor), the videos, the games, the community I am now a part of- it's changed us! I have made life long friends, shared ideas all with these amazing people who have walked the walk with me and made this do-able!

I'll be honest, I've started doing the baby steps countless times. I think since my oldest was born! Lol But it wasn't until I became a premium member that it clicked.

It was like magic! I didn't force anyone in my house to be a Flybaby, I just did my thing, consistently, every day. Then I noticed when I'd take things to shelters to give away, my husband would add something, or my middle step daughter would give me a pair of socks.

But the biggest eye opener happened yesterday. Let me be clear: I don't talk about my routines. I don't talk about Flylady. I don't ask them or make anyone in my family do anything. What I'm about to share with you genuinely shocked me.

During her homeschool break, my middle daughter randomly decluttered her coloring books in exactly 15 minutes. She gave me a give away and throw away pile! I was decluttering too! That's 30 minutes clutter free right there! And I did not ask her to do it!

Immediately after this, I went into my oldest daughter's room to swish and swipe. I was taken back when I looked at her bathroom mirror. She'd written on it with a dry erase marker. I guess she watched me write my own to do list on my bathroom mirror. But when I saw what she wrote, I was in purple puddles...she wrote her own evening and morning routine. "Wash my face, put out my clothes, take my medicine" etc. We don't really talk about it...I don't know how she knew?

I took a picture and ran to my husband. Who finally saw my control journal and my routines for the very first time. I then showed him the picture of her mirror... and he cried too. Here we've been thinking she's been unreachable, at 14 in her room all the time, with her mother gone, but we are reaching her by example! He hugged me and told me I'm a good mom to our girls and a good example. And he's so glad I'm in their lives.

Today my middle daughter told me I am obsessed with Flylady. I laughed and told her I'm not obsessed, but that routines are a part of our lives. We then talked out her morning and evening routines. She then sang your Rockin Routines song! Lol

I'm so thankful for you and your system. I'm thankful for Alex for giving those of us needing a nudge, the wonderful feeling that we can do it-our way. Especially, thank you for giving us a plan flexible enough to fit all families, like homeschooling families, or kids with special needs (I fit both). Thank you for changing my life. I have so much more than a clean house.

-Alana, FlyLady Premium Member

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